Sportin' the Piggies

Kaylee's hair is just now getting long enough for pig tails!

She gets excited when I put her hair in "Piggies" :)

Tonight after bath we tried it and noticed her hair has grown! 

Fun girl! 

Sweet Kaylee

We had another great day of playing around here! Kaylee has SO much fun with her big brothers and sister! She plays non-stop with them...I have to break up the fun to give her a nap :)  She plays with me too...but really it just seems like she wants me there near her or in the same room and she'd really rather play with the kids! All 3 big kids are SO great with her - so patient and helpful...it's fun to see how God is using their little sister to form such AMAZING hearts in them! Each of the big kids had to get some of their school work done (from missing 2 weeks of school while in China) - so they all did their work as quickly as possible in order to get back to playing with Kaylee....I'm not really sure what Miss Kaylee will do next week when all 3 big kids are in school! She won't know what to do with out the FUN MAKERS around!!!

This is what I get to look at each night as I watch Kaylee fall asleep:

 Tonight I was just staring at how beautiful she is...her perfect little lips and beautiful long eye lashes. I was praying that one day she will come to know the truth about who she is - that God knit her perfectly together in her mother's womb for HIS GLORY! I was praying that her sweet beauty on the inside would always shine for Him. I know that He has amazing plans for her precious little life!

We had the sweetest evening with her tonight. My brother and sister-in-law had our big kids and it was just us and Kaylee all afternoon. She had so much fun playing with us (not quite as much fun as she has with the big kids - she didn't get as rowdy). But she had us come to her room where her play kitchen is and she "fed" us with a play spoon. Then she took the play knife and used it as a comb and brushed  our hair (funny how she thought it was a comb - it looks like the comb I use to brush her hair after her bath each night). So she went back and forth for a while giving us each a turn to have our hair brushed :)  She was so soft and gentle when she "brushed" our hair - she barely even touched our hair. Then we went into the family room where her toy basket is and she got out her musical toys (she LOVES music!!!) She would push the button and start clapping to the music and we would copy her and clap along. Then she would pat the toy box with her hands and we would pat along with her...she loved that we would copy each thing that she did. From all of the reading I have done, we know that playing where we copy her is a great form of bonding!

Later in the evening when it was time for her bedtime bottle she seemed to get sad. We keep everything the same each evening, so she knew that it was bedtime. At first she tried to get silly and play (like to avoid bedtime) and then she decided to just refuse taking her bottle. I read her book to her again (Goodnight Moon - which is what seems to be her favorite) and tried again. I tried to get silly and make a game out of giving her the bottle by pretending like I was drinking it, then pretending like the bottle was going to get her tummy, then her nose, etc. She thought it was funny at first and liked the game but still would not take the bottle. I kept trying to be silly and then she had finally had enough...she just started crying and got so sad. I knew exactly where her pain was coming from and that she is still grieving a significant loss. It made me think of when I was little and would go to a friends to sleep over --- I'd be fine all day while we were playing but at night I'd get sad and miss my parents and my home. That's where I feel like sweet Kaylee is right now - she has so much fun playing and getting to discover things she has never seen before during the day. But at night I can see the sadness in her and I know that she is still grieving the only life she has known for the first 2 1/2 years of her life. I just held her and told her I am so sorry for her pain and sadness and I couldn't help but cry right with her - I was really trying not to because I know she reads my reactions. I told her, "I know you're so sad, but Mommy made this really great bottle for you and I know you will love it...will you just try it?" And I put it to her lips and she took it! I know she didn't understand my words, but I think she knew that I understood a bit of her pain and she allowed me to see a glimpse of her feelings... and that may have helped her give in and take the bottle.

I feel like overall she is doing SO WELL! She loves to play and is really happy so long as things go her way...she has her moments of tantrums when I have to pull her away or not allow her to do something, but she lets me comfort her and usually gains control within minutes. She still has not said any words but tonight she started using the sign for "please" (we just started showing her this a few days ago!). She waves "hi" and "bye" and will blow kisses when we tell her to ;)  She understands SO much of what we are saying - it really is amazing how quickly she is learning!

She really has such a sweet side to her...she can also be so strong when she wants to be! It reminds me of her Big Sis and Bros- a wonderful mix of both sweet and strong! A great combination for leading people to Jesus!

This is how she was laying when Sissy came into my room this morning - she just had to snap a picture...Kaylee got all turned around in the night! She has been letting me roll her off of me to sleep - usually about 45 minutes after we go to bed and then stays on her own most of the night!

We went to the dentist today to have her teeth checked - good news! The layer on her teeth is most likely just build up and plaque so it doesn't look like he will need to pull any teeth! He didn't see any visible cavities (although he couldn't get an X-ray to tell for sure) so he thought a good cleaning is all she will need. We will schedule that for another time :) She wasn't happy about him looking in her mouth but he let me hold her the whole time and she was fine as soon as he let her lay on my shoulder. She was happy to get a balloon when it was all over!

Feeling much better now that we are headed home!

Kaylee Grace's Care Package

We were SO excited to get to send off our care package this weekend ;)

Here are some of the items that we sent: Goodnight Moon (recordable book where I got to record my voice reading to her! Another adoptive mom who is adopting a little girl from Kaylee's orphanage gave me this idea), a couple of toys, soft blanket, lovey, footie pj's, socks, toddler toothbrush and toothpaste, disposable camera (hoping that they will take some pictures of her over these next couple of months and then they give it to us when we get her!), and the soft photo book with our family pictures in it ;)

 Here are some close-ups of the book:

Dear Jesus, we pray in Your Holy Name that You will so knit our hearts with Kaylee Grace's heart as we wait to hold her. We pray that Your Holy Spirit will SO cover her and that she will become so familiar with Your Spirit surrounding her... so that when we get there and get to hold her we will feel strangely familiar to her as she senses Your Spirit in us!!!

And here are the kids and Brodie in front of the post office 

The postal lady let them decorate the box too!

Wo ai ni means "I love you" in chinese

You will love our jiating (our family) ;)

We love you, Kaylee Grace! We can't wait to hold you and pour the love of Jesus into you :)

LOI (letter of intent)

Last Friday (11/9) was the day that we officially submitted our LOI (letter of intent) to adopt this sweet little one. Brodie and I woke up the Thursday morning before and as I mentioned in our last post, we were really wrestling with the doctors reports that we had received and what we thought the Lord was pressing on our hearts. We were praying for clarity - we prayed together and then each had our own time seeking the Lord. As Brod was praying, he saw this sweet one sitting in the room in which we saw her in the pictures and he saw a very bright light shinning on her. He also saw joy on her. He felt as if Jesus was showing him that His light is on her and He will fill her with joy.

Earlier that morning as I prayed, I felt as if I could see a door opened with God's Hand welcoming us in - we couldn't see anything through the door - everything was unknown...all we knew was that God was inviting us in; inviting us on a journey where we would see His glory. We had the freedom to choose whether we went or not - it was our choice and He wouldn't be upset if we didn't. But if we didn't, we would miss experiencing Him in this way. It was an invitation - not a demand or something we were being told to obey. I felt as if the Lord was saying, "Come with Me on this journey, take My Hand and come and see My Glory!"

We have to "officially" transfer agencies (which we are already in the process of) and then we will wait for PA (pre-approval). Once we receive PA we wait for LOA (letter of acceptance) - this is the one that usually takes the longest to receive -  in which we will be officially approved to adopt this particular girl. Then we have a couple of other quick approvals and we will be off to China :)

Just like every other adoptive parent, we are praying that we will get these approvals quickly and be able to travel soon - especially since she is already over 2! We know that the first 3 years are SO critical in brain development so we are asking the Lord to make a way for us to get there soon and begin forming those critical attachments. Above all, we know that HE alone has carried her since HE knit her in her mother's womb and HE WILL continue to carry her throughout her whole life! His timing is perfect ;)

Over the last week we have researched and gathered so much information that has been helpful in getting us prepared to bring our sweet one home - our agency has been so wonderful in helping us!

We will post some pictures of what we've been up to this last week once we have some down time next week before Thanksgiving ;)

Adoption Update!!!

This journey has been long and beautiful in every way. We wouldn't trade all that we have learned and all the ways that God has grown each one of us. It's been nearly a year and a half of waiting but we are finally matched with a precious little girl who is desperately in need of God's love and a family to hold her. Here is a copy of an email we sent out to friends/family earlier today...

We received a referral on Tuesday (11/6) of a 28-month precious little girl! Let me back up a few months - both Brodie and I have been feeling the Lord open our hearts to more difficult special needs. Constantly being reminded that our lives are not our own and that we are to count everything a loss compared to knowing Jesus.  The needs of this little girl were greater than we had originally felt comfortable with and as the social worker described her file to us over the phone, both Brodie and I felt excited but anxious. Her needs that are listed are, "polydactyly (extra thumb on each hand), strabismus (crossed/lazy eyes) and mild cerebral palsy". 

After our social worker read her file to us she explained that her greatest need is that she is coming from a welfare institution where the kids are severely neglected and malnourished. Never held. No toys at all. Only touch is an occasional diaper change. Even their bottles are propped up for feedings. ;(   I said to our social worker, "I know you pray over each child's file - what made you choose us for this little girl?" She said that she knew that this child was going to need extra love and compassion and she thought of our family, she felt that not many families would have the compassion it will take to love and nurture her little life. This immediately reminded me that this process is not about us or what we want or imagine- it's about a child that God is asking us to love; it's about His glory. Our lives are not our own.

We prayed before we looked at the file where we would first see her pictures. As Brodie prayed I sensed the Lord asking me in my spirit, "Will you be My Hands and Feet to her?" In my heart I said yes but was fearful. I asked the Lord for something - a birthdate that stuck out, a name, anything significant where we would know it was our daughter right away. We opened the file - nothing stood out. Her picture was so sad- she looked SO sad and hopeless. Our kids were 100% in from the second they saw her picture. I sat them down and explained what her needs may look like for our family- that just made them want to get her and love her more. 

Brodie and I processed and decided to have some doctors look at the file. The first Dr that got back to us was our friend - he mentioned the possibility of her symptoms being related to some type of syndrome. This took us a couple of steps back. The next Dr was even more concerned - very concerned. She said the chances were too great that these symptoms were related something life threatening down the road. She advised us not to move forward.  

We sat our kids down again - we explained in great detail what the doctors were concerned about. Again they were even more sure that we should go get her and love her. Kennady said, "Mom, we can't just leave her there! She could just die there - if we get her then at least we can tell her about Jesus and she will get to go to Heaven." (Whew! God's love is fierce! Just the thought that He would love this precious girl enough that He may call us to bring her into our home to love on and teach her about Jesus so that she can spend eternity with Him!)  The boys agreed. Brodie and I wrestled. On one hand we knew what we were to do - on the other we were so fearful of all the unknowns. It's so crazy because we went right into protective mode for our other 3 kids - like we wanted to protect them from the potential of such deep pain. Brodie wanted to protect me. We needed a clear Word! If He said Go, we would Go.

Yesterday we finally talked to a Dr who went to China to visit her in April (she lives in America and volunteers her time to go overseas and examine these children for our agency so that they can give us a more accurate report). She believes that she is developmentally so far behind due to her neglectful environment and lack of stimulation. She is the size of a 12 mo old and is 28 mo. They put her at 9 mo developmentally. She feels that this precious child will THRIVE when in a loving home!!! She feels that she did not see any indication of any type of syndrome. She said that on day 1 of her visit she was very concerned about this precious one - no eye contact, non-responsive, they got nothing out of her. Day 2 they went in and she smiled and made eye contact (this was HUGE progress and made her feel like this girl is so far behind because of environment and severe neglect). **Sidenote: It is such a praise that they went back the 2nd day - most of the time they only get 1 day to evaluate these little ones but in this rare case they were able to go back a 2nd day - which gave them a better chance to see each of the kids and what a difference 1 day made for most every one of them! This gave the doctors confidence that environment was a HUGE factor in why these kids were so delayed**  She is not even on the chart for height or weight BUT her head is on the chart and has tracked really well which leads this doctor to believe that her growth delays are due to malnutrition and what little nutrition she is getting is going to her brain. She feels that the cp diagnosis could very well be that she has spent 28 months in a crib and she may not even have it. She gave us a game plan for the first 3 months of having her home to begin to catch her up and felt really HOPEFUL and even SURE that she will start to blossom once she has love. 

All I can say is that we got off that call and both felt complete PEACE about going forward. Our fears turned to great excitement! We are realistically knowing that this will be a ton of work - our kids are fully aware of what this looks like and we all couldn't feel more ready to start being Jesus' Hands and Feet to her!!! For now we feel led to not even label her with ANYTHING (of course the doctors here will know all they need to from her medical file). But we're feeling led to just get her home and love on her and give her a chance to begin to be all that God created her to be with no labels.  If after being loved on for some time she still has symptoms then we know she will have wonderful care here at Children's Hospital and God will use all that He has chosen her to be for His glory! We just want to give her a chance and see what a difference LOVE makes - we are aware and prepared for what to be cautious about and whatever God has for this precious little one, we will trust Him and His great plan. He is good! 

So now we will submit our letter to adopt her and have a series of approvals to get through which will take about 3-4 months and then we get to go get her :) We will post pictures as soon as we receive "pre-approval" (which could take a few weeks since we have to officially finish transferring agencies).

We will spend the next few months preparing by studying more about attachment and bonding for these little ones who come from such extreme conditions. And we will continue to PRAY that the Holy Spirit will knit our hearts with hers so that she feels His love and peace right away when we hold her. We are trusting God for a miracle to bring wholeness in this child's life in every way!

Even after we sent this email out, another doctor called us who had reviewed her file and expressed his concerns for our family moving forward with this sweet one. For a moment fear tried to creep back in but right away we stood firm in the PEACE that THE GOD WHO CREATED HER gave us yesterday...His plans are always BEST - they may not look best or feel best...but they ARE best!!! Here is the verse that I am clinging to right now:

"The fruit of righteousness will be peace; 

the effect of righteousness will be quietness and assurance forever." 

Isaiah 32:17

A commentary from M. Henry on this verse said this: Quietness and assurance forever... that is, a holy serenity and security of mind, by which the soul enjoys itself and enjoys its God, and it is not in the power of this world to disturb it in those enjoyments.

In other words, when we have this holy serenity and security of mind that ONLY Jesus can give us, our soul is so at rest, so filled with enjoyment that even the worries of this world will not and cannot disturb the peace He fills our souls with when we rest in Him and follow His Way of Righteousness. 

We were able to experience this peace, this assurance today when the "power of this world" came to disturb our peace and assurance and that peace and assurance He has given us was so real and so true that although it stumbled for a moment, it was not disturbed. Thank You Jesus that You are far above the ways of this world - Your Ways are not our own!

Adoption Update

We've had a full week on the adoption front...it all started with a dream that I had on Sunday night. I was in a room with a bunch of kids who all had the same shirts on. I realized that they were all orphans and in my dream I heard God say to me, "Will you take care of the least of these for Me? The very least of these... and show them My love." In my dream I said, "Yes, Lord, just show me what to do." Then I woke up.

The name on their shirts kept coming back to my mind all day the next day so I finally looked it up to see if it was a real organization - I had not heard of it before. Well, it is a real organization...and not only that, it is a home for special needs orphans in China! I was blown away so I called Brod and told him all about my dream. He looked it up and called. The most wonderful lady answered and was so helpful to him. From listening to where we were at in the process and how long we'd been waiting, she sensed that something was up and encouraged us to find out about a couple of things.

Well, our facilitator was going to be in town 2 days later and she agreed to meet with us regarding some of our concerns. This spurred our agency on to meet with us beforehand and let us know that they had recently found out that our agency had been on probation and unable to lock any children's files since around January. We were shocked! But immediately we knew and trusted that God was up to something and still ENTIRELY in control. So, we called the helpful lady back from the organization in my dream and asked her where she thought we should go from here. She had 3 GREAT (almost too great because it was hard to decide) agencies for us to look into. We loved them all but ultimately felt a bit more led to one so we switched today and we are really excited!!! We know and trust that God has a great plan...He has already chosen our daughter since before time began and nothing can stop His perfect plan from unfolding.

 I had a friend remind me of a book called When Life and Beliefs Collide which says, "If God is Sovereign, then plan B is a myth. No matter how dark things look to us, or how big the mess we're in, we're in plan A." (p.72)  "We run a planned race." (p. 70)  What a great reminder! Brodie and I were really praying through where the Lord was leading us and really wanting to hear clearly...and the reminder that we cannot mess up His plans no matter what we do came at just the right time! If we are seeking Him, He will honor that - He knows how we want what HE wants more than anything! It helped us to walk in the direction that we were most feeling led to and just
REST and TRUST in Him for the rest!

Things should be switched by next week and we will move forward from there!

"God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
thought its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells."

Psalm 46: 1-4

Waiting on The Lord

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him;
those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land." Psalm 37: 7,9


The other night we were saying our bedtime prayers and we always pray for Kaylee. Kolson had such a heartfelt prayer asking God to "bring Kaylee soon because it feels like we are not even going to get a baby anymore". I so understand his prayer. Our hearts long to have her home with us, to know who she is and have a date set to go and get her. But as adults, Brodie and I can understand and even appreciate that the process and journey are so important to having her here with us. We know that God has stripped so much from us and He has so much more to strip...we have grown so much in Him these last 9 months. And He continues to remind us that 9 months ago adoption was not even on our radar...so who are we to try and rush Him now. We trust in His timing and even more than I want to know who she is and have her home right away, I want HIS Will, HIS timing, HIS Way. But for a 7 year old that is so hard to understand.


Dear Jesus, I pray that You will strengthen all of our hearts as we wait. Please continue to make us more like You and less like ourselves. I ask that You will put Your love in our hearts, Your patience, Your desires. Lord, Your Word says that we are to lay down our lives in order to find true life in You. O, how I can see that we have lived life so much for ourselves and only You can work in us to live life all for You and those that You put in front of us. I confess we need You to do this in us! So as we wait, will You please help us to consider everything a loss compared to knowing You! 
Help us to love others with Your love!!!






I came across this devotional today from CBN.com

Waiting on God Patiently

By Andrew Murray

Andrew Murray (1828-1917), was born in Cape Town, South Africa and became a revered missionary leader in the late 1800s and early 1900s, promoting and establishing missions in South Africa. His devotional writings are considered classics of the Christian faith. This devotional is taken from Murray's series of writings titled, Waiting on God.


If we truly set ourselves to wait upon God, we shall find that it is with Him we are impatient, because He does not at once, or as soon as we could wish, do our bidding. It is in waiting upon God that our eyes are opened to believe in His wise and sovereign will, and to see that the sooner and the more completely we yield absolutely to it, the more surely His blessing can come to us. 


The waiting is to teach us our absolute dependence upon God’s mighty working, and to make us in perfect patience place ourselves at His disposal. They that wait on the Lord shall inherit the land; the promised land and its blessing. The heirs must wait; they can afford to wait.It is resting in the Lord, in His will, His promise, His faithfulness, and His love, that makes patience easy. 


And the resting in Him is nothing but being silent unto Him, still before Him. Having our thoughts and wishes, our fears and hopes, hushed into calm and quiet in that great peace of God which passeth all understanding.That peace keeps the heart and mind when we are anxious for anything, because we have made our request known to Him. The rest, the silence, the stillness, and the patient waiting, all find their strength and joy in God Himself.


“Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him.”

Yes, for HIM. Seek not only the help, the gift, thou needest seek: HIMSELF; wait for HIM. Give God His glory by resting in Him, by trusting him fully, by waiting patiently for Him. This patience honours Him greatly; it leaves Him, as God on the throne, to do His work; it yields self wholly into His hands. It lets God be God.

If thy waiting be for some special request, wait patiently. If thy waiting be more the exercise of the spiritual life seeking to know and have more of God, wait patiently.

Whether it be in the shorter specific periods of waiting, or as the continuous habit of the souls. Rest in the Lord, be still before the Lord, and wait patiently. “They that wait on the Lord shall inherit the land."


Thank You, Jesus, for seasons of waiting. We PRAISE YOU for we know that You are at work even when we can't see You! It is when we can't see You that our faith is put into action. We trust You to bring us our Kaylee Grace in Your perfect timing. And we trust You to work so deeply in us in this process...that we will grow stronger in You, You will grow us to "consider our lives worth nothing if only we may finish the race and complete the task that You, Jesus, have given us - the task of testifying to the Gospel of Your Grace!"(Acts 20:24) I know that at the beginning of this journey when we first felt You call us I felt You say that through this process You would bring freedom and faith through it and I trust You for that. Thank You, Jesus..."for You who call us are FAITHFUL and You will do it"!!!!! (1Thes 5:24)